If you don’t know what I’m talking about when I say “obstacles to reading,” if you don’t have a child (or more than one child) who has struggled in any way with learning to read, if your response to other caregivers who are dealing with this issue is to say things like, “Oh, my kids never had a problem! They were reading
I totally agree about letting kids read what they want and not stressing about the quality of it. Letting them choose gives them ownership and makes such a big difference.
Thank you for writing this! I don't have kids of my own, but I'm a second-grade teacher and am often worried about the ones whose reading skills are still developing. I have loved reading since I was a child myself, so it's hard for me to fathom what it's like to not enjoy reading. Sometimes it helps if I remind myself what it was like for me to learn how to read in Chinese -- so much effort that the end result wasn't worth it, especially because I would have to reread multiple times to understand what the text said.
I for sure agree about not stressing about the quality of the books. For my students' book reports, they have to pick books at their "level," but for all other reading, it's their choice. It's more important that kids read something *they* want to read, even if it's not "good," than that they slog through something because they are forced to.
My kids didn’t struggle with learning to read, but my youngest lost interest in reading for years. Well, he’d read the same graphic novel series over and over, which counts! Haha. I let it go (but still got him books as gifts) and waited for him to come around again, and he eventually did.
Digesting stones...I love that. Gonna be thinking about that. And sort of the flip side to this too, is that learning disabilities like NVLD can lead to kids who might be good, early readers, but struggle with...basically everything else? Just another notch in the let's not compare collumn!
My 1st grader loves to read but struggles to read if that makes sense? We read aloud everyday, he listens to audio books, and we do make books on his "level" available to him. He reads for homework (out loud to us) but it is hard for him. I guess we just wait? Thank you for this article!
As a former preschool teacher who helped many children start their reading journey, and a homeschooling parent who watched multiple homeschooled children learning in diverse ways, let me just say that your number one point is absolutely critical.
Children learn to read when their brains are ready to do that, and not before. Children who aren't pushed to read before they are ready (and thus don't acquire all the negative feelings and shame about reading) can become eager readers at the right time. I saw children teach themselves to read at 2 or 3; I also personally knew two kids who didn't learn to read until they were NINE. As homeschoolers, their parents just kept reading to them--not just fiction, but all the books on topics they needed to learn or were fascinated with. Both those kids went on to hold graduate degrees, and in one case graduated from college before the age of 20. Age of reading acquisition doesn't affect later proficiency or enjoyment, unless the child has so many negative experiences that it becomes insurmountable. Neither children nor parents are at fault for "delayed" reading, and neither are most teachers, who are simply trying to do what they are mandated to do. The more everyone can back off, and allow children to learn on their own schedule while supporting them in other ways of acquiring information, the better.
Oh Sarah, I love EVERYTHING about this post. You have totally nailed it. This is brilliant! (And I feel like this applies to *all* learning "obstacles", not just reading!)
I love this. I've been trying my best to just be consistent and patient, but after having one very early reader who just took off in the middle of All About Reading Level 1 and never looked back, my second is only now starting to be 1) independently interested and 2) anywhere near fluent, at coming up on 8. But he's trying to sound things out on his own (and he's doing it!)... I don't know whether it was a slight struggle with vision, his older brother reading everything to him, just a different developmental timeline...
Honestly? It probably doesn't matter, and I've been doing my absolute best to listen to all the wise people who tell me that it's very normal for kids to read *anywhere* between 4-8. But man, it sure makes you second guess all the things. We have books everywhere. They listen to audiobooks every day, my husband reads aloud every night, and there was still zip, zero, zilch desire for him to do anything beyond the 20 min phonics lesson. And then maybe about 3 weeks ago, we're sitting in church and he leans over to say, "Does that say, "Behold the Lamb of God?" I shouted an internal "Hallelujah! Finally!" Phewwww. I think we're going to make it. And I'm grateful for homeschooling for this child, because he doesn't know anything's wrong (because it isn't).
Oh, also, the only thing he wants to sound out and read independently are those really awful LEGO comic books that tell a dumbed down rendition of Star Wars or Jurassic World 😂
Oh Sarah, as a mom and librarian, I just love you for this piece ❤️ I have three kiddos, all raised in the exact same house, same schooling and two of them have always loved reading and one, as soon as they were made to start reading independently, stopped. They loved being read to and adored audiobooks and by all measures can read effectively, but just lost that love and it hasn’t come back yet. I have hope, though! It can be hard to admit as an educator and librarian that one of my kids is MEH on reading, but there’s room in this world for all types of readers, even just the occasional ones ❤️
My first child didn't really read until he was 9 or so. I read to him (and his sister, 19 months later) basically from the womb. We'd spend *at least* a cumulative hour per day reading. Both of them have always been reading in my lap, next to me, then on their own (once they could do it) but it was a long road to get them reading *tangible* books; they are both dyslexic.
I started "100 Easy Reading Lessons" or whatever it's called when my son was in K. He got angry and stomped away. I tried a few other things, about 6 months apart of the last 'trial', and it was always anger and frustration. This from a kid who would listen to nearly a book per day on audio and have perfect recollection. Thank goodness our umbrella school (we homeschool in BC, Canada, but enrollment means you have some measure of support like learning services) say his issues with reading, writing, math, etc. and gave him a psych-ed evaluation, which proved all 3, along with another diagnosis. His sister presented the same issues, but on a smaller degree. She didn't read until about 9 or 10 independently. We just kept reading aloud, and that was the right decision.
After remediation work, they both learned to read. That, and getting a bit older, their reading just took off, after years of it being super hard.
I like what Marlena said below: "+ Take the pressure off, + Provide time, space, and support (for reading), + Read (aloud, read aloud, read aloud), + Promote choice"
A kid may not be able to articulate WHY reading is hard or WHAT is even happening (squiggly letters? headaches? etc.?) but if they like listening to stories and can tell you something about it back to you, it may be a language-based learning disability (LBLD). Maybe not, but I'd guess that many, many kids who 'don't like reading' find the mechanics of doing it challenging. After some questions of adults in my life who also have told me they didn't read, I think (most) of them having a LBLD, that went completely undiagnosed or they could 'compensate' in other ways to get by.
Of course people can choose to not like reading, but just about every form of entertainment (movies, video games, tv shows, journalism, even branding!) is made up of stories in some format. I'm skeptical. LOL
Thank you for this. My kid has a retained primitive reflex that affects her eye tracking, thus, affected her ability to read. This makes me feel less alone.
I totally agree about letting kids read what they want and not stressing about the quality of it. Letting them choose gives them ownership and makes such a big difference.
I have 2 kids-one loves reading, the other hates it. I’m trying to accept it.
Thank you for writing this! I don't have kids of my own, but I'm a second-grade teacher and am often worried about the ones whose reading skills are still developing. I have loved reading since I was a child myself, so it's hard for me to fathom what it's like to not enjoy reading. Sometimes it helps if I remind myself what it was like for me to learn how to read in Chinese -- so much effort that the end result wasn't worth it, especially because I would have to reread multiple times to understand what the text said.
I for sure agree about not stressing about the quality of the books. For my students' book reports, they have to pick books at their "level," but for all other reading, it's their choice. It's more important that kids read something *they* want to read, even if it's not "good," than that they slog through something because they are forced to.
My kids didn’t struggle with learning to read, but my youngest lost interest in reading for years. Well, he’d read the same graphic novel series over and over, which counts! Haha. I let it go (but still got him books as gifts) and waited for him to come around again, and he eventually did.
Digesting stones...I love that. Gonna be thinking about that. And sort of the flip side to this too, is that learning disabilities like NVLD can lead to kids who might be good, early readers, but struggle with...basically everything else? Just another notch in the let's not compare collumn!
I deeply appreciate your wise and compassionate advice! Thank you.
I feel like these pointers are a Life Anthem:
+ Take the pressure off
+ Provide time, space, and support (for reading)
+ Read (aloud, read aloud, read aloud)
+ Promote choice
My 1st grader loves to read but struggles to read if that makes sense? We read aloud everyday, he listens to audio books, and we do make books on his "level" available to him. He reads for homework (out loud to us) but it is hard for him. I guess we just wait? Thank you for this article!
As a former preschool teacher who helped many children start their reading journey, and a homeschooling parent who watched multiple homeschooled children learning in diverse ways, let me just say that your number one point is absolutely critical.
Children learn to read when their brains are ready to do that, and not before. Children who aren't pushed to read before they are ready (and thus don't acquire all the negative feelings and shame about reading) can become eager readers at the right time. I saw children teach themselves to read at 2 or 3; I also personally knew two kids who didn't learn to read until they were NINE. As homeschoolers, their parents just kept reading to them--not just fiction, but all the books on topics they needed to learn or were fascinated with. Both those kids went on to hold graduate degrees, and in one case graduated from college before the age of 20. Age of reading acquisition doesn't affect later proficiency or enjoyment, unless the child has so many negative experiences that it becomes insurmountable. Neither children nor parents are at fault for "delayed" reading, and neither are most teachers, who are simply trying to do what they are mandated to do. The more everyone can back off, and allow children to learn on their own schedule while supporting them in other ways of acquiring information, the better.
Oh Sarah, I love EVERYTHING about this post. You have totally nailed it. This is brilliant! (And I feel like this applies to *all* learning "obstacles", not just reading!)
I love this. I've been trying my best to just be consistent and patient, but after having one very early reader who just took off in the middle of All About Reading Level 1 and never looked back, my second is only now starting to be 1) independently interested and 2) anywhere near fluent, at coming up on 8. But he's trying to sound things out on his own (and he's doing it!)... I don't know whether it was a slight struggle with vision, his older brother reading everything to him, just a different developmental timeline...
Honestly? It probably doesn't matter, and I've been doing my absolute best to listen to all the wise people who tell me that it's very normal for kids to read *anywhere* between 4-8. But man, it sure makes you second guess all the things. We have books everywhere. They listen to audiobooks every day, my husband reads aloud every night, and there was still zip, zero, zilch desire for him to do anything beyond the 20 min phonics lesson. And then maybe about 3 weeks ago, we're sitting in church and he leans over to say, "Does that say, "Behold the Lamb of God?" I shouted an internal "Hallelujah! Finally!" Phewwww. I think we're going to make it. And I'm grateful for homeschooling for this child, because he doesn't know anything's wrong (because it isn't).
Oh, also, the only thing he wants to sound out and read independently are those really awful LEGO comic books that tell a dumbed down rendition of Star Wars or Jurassic World 😂
Excellent advice. Thank you for sharing, as always!
Oh Sarah, as a mom and librarian, I just love you for this piece ❤️ I have three kiddos, all raised in the exact same house, same schooling and two of them have always loved reading and one, as soon as they were made to start reading independently, stopped. They loved being read to and adored audiobooks and by all measures can read effectively, but just lost that love and it hasn’t come back yet. I have hope, though! It can be hard to admit as an educator and librarian that one of my kids is MEH on reading, but there’s room in this world for all types of readers, even just the occasional ones ❤️
My first child didn't really read until he was 9 or so. I read to him (and his sister, 19 months later) basically from the womb. We'd spend *at least* a cumulative hour per day reading. Both of them have always been reading in my lap, next to me, then on their own (once they could do it) but it was a long road to get them reading *tangible* books; they are both dyslexic.
I started "100 Easy Reading Lessons" or whatever it's called when my son was in K. He got angry and stomped away. I tried a few other things, about 6 months apart of the last 'trial', and it was always anger and frustration. This from a kid who would listen to nearly a book per day on audio and have perfect recollection. Thank goodness our umbrella school (we homeschool in BC, Canada, but enrollment means you have some measure of support like learning services) say his issues with reading, writing, math, etc. and gave him a psych-ed evaluation, which proved all 3, along with another diagnosis. His sister presented the same issues, but on a smaller degree. She didn't read until about 9 or 10 independently. We just kept reading aloud, and that was the right decision.
After remediation work, they both learned to read. That, and getting a bit older, their reading just took off, after years of it being super hard.
I like what Marlena said below: "+ Take the pressure off, + Provide time, space, and support (for reading), + Read (aloud, read aloud, read aloud), + Promote choice"
A kid may not be able to articulate WHY reading is hard or WHAT is even happening (squiggly letters? headaches? etc.?) but if they like listening to stories and can tell you something about it back to you, it may be a language-based learning disability (LBLD). Maybe not, but I'd guess that many, many kids who 'don't like reading' find the mechanics of doing it challenging. After some questions of adults in my life who also have told me they didn't read, I think (most) of them having a LBLD, that went completely undiagnosed or they could 'compensate' in other ways to get by.
Of course people can choose to not like reading, but just about every form of entertainment (movies, video games, tv shows, journalism, even branding!) is made up of stories in some format. I'm skeptical. LOL
Thank you for this. My kid has a retained primitive reflex that affects her eye tracking, thus, affected her ability to read. This makes me feel less alone.