What are your thoughts about books that knock you over the head with the message?
April 23, 2024
Good morning! Let’s jump right in today.
📫 Questions from you
Hi! I’m loving your newsletter. I’m curious what your thoughts are on books that knock you over the head with the message. Our childcare provider mentioned that some of the books we have or have checked out or been gifted (published more recently) are too much about emotions and too formulaic.
Some examples: The Smart Cookie / The Sour Grape (really the whole series — we got some at Costco), Ricky, The Rock That Couldn’t Roll by Mr. Jay, the Pete Reynolds series (Be You! — this last one is pretty, but can be preachy).
I’m not sure if my 5yo even gets any of it. Thoughts? Is something like The Paper Bag Princess [by Robert Munsch] that has a message but not syrupy, knock-you- over-the-head better?
💌 Dear You,
These books are annoying. Period, the end.
Okay, not the end: I’m being a little cheeky, but I’m also completely serious: I can’t stand “books that knock you over the head with the message;” I am frustrated by the recent, massive shift in publishing toward stories that teach a lesson; and I don’t (and won’t) buy or read overly didactic and moralistic titles to my own kids.
Why? Because they’re terrible. They often sacrifice story for message. They’re regularly heavy-handed to the point of being insulting to the intelligence of children. They’re a huge drag to read.
As for whether your 5yo gets any of it — I think they probably understand perfectly, and probably more than you know. It’s just: who wants to read these types of books? They’re boring. They’re boring to children, and they’re boring to us.
I’ve written before about values in picture books — and how there are many wonderful titles that manage to convey all the good, important things we’d like to impart, without being heavy-handed, while also telling a great story that’s enjoyable and compelling for children:
(It’s also worth pointing out that everyone has different values, everyone will have a different tolerance level for didactic books, and, sometimes you need titles that do a job for you. For example, a few years ago one of my children had a “friend” who, as far as I could tell, just treated her like trash. We had many conversations about this situation, of course, and I finally ended up buying a book called The Not-So-Friendly Friend: How to Set Boundaries for Healthy Friendships by Christina Furnival, which is pure knock-you-over-the-head-with-the-message from beginning to end. But I wasn’t reading this book to my daughter for pleasure, it wasn’t for the purpose of an excellent and engaging read-aloud experience between the two of us — it was a tool. In that sense, sometimes you might need a book with a message like a lead vest. Do what you need to do.)
Back to the larger topic: author and fellow Substacker
addressed this in a thoughtful post last fall, and it’s well worth a click to go ahead and read it:
My mom has always said, “There are too many good books in the world to waste time reading one you don’t like.”
I’ll add: there are too many good books in the world to waste time reading one that treats you — and your child — like you cannot understand a moral lesson in literature unless it explodes in your face or rolls over you like a boulder or hits you like a train, Wile E. Coyote, Acme Corporation-style.
I recognize that there might be a time and place for these books, and — this is important — everyone will have to decide for themselves what’s best for their families and situations, but in short: I despise these books, deeply.
You have full permission not to read a single one.
Sarah
Just joining the choir here :) my kids are older now, but i also found those books irritating in the extreme. Especially the ones that were overtly “for girls.” Some of it I found went too far, like they were meant to be empowering but blew way past that, into something almost toxic. Girls don’t need picture books that are basically lectures about how they must go out there and “be amazing” or “fearless” or whatever. No one needs that!
I'm seeing that shift you're talking about in middle grade too, tbh. There's just a lot more values-driven stuff, and its just as boring there as it is in picture books. I think these things come in waves though, and I don't think it'll be too long before we see a backlash.